Mum,Lets Settle Our Differences
So I get home from the market and I am pretty exhausted but I have to get dinner ready and I am really not in the mood for the noise the children are making , so I call out to them from the Kitchen to keep it down but they are so carried away and their noise is getting louder so I go to them and this time I am yelling,but I do not realize it so I dispatch them to their different rooms ,keeping them apart will reduce the noise hopefully and I ask my eldest to join me in the kitchen…..
Cooking Is In top gear , the aroma is delicious and everything is looking good so I turn around with a smile to my daughter ,Wow! we have done very well you can set the table now, but she is not smiling back ,actually she is frowning so I ask her what the matter is and she goes mum lets settle our differences!……I am literary shocked,I mean like mouth agape, eyes wide open!..Okay, I manage to say, Lets talk.
” I am going to tell you all the things I like about you and also the things I do not like ,you too will do same and we can settle our differences “.
Okay I say still trying to be calm,you go first,grab a chair and sit
“I like you because you are kind, she says,..you buy us stuff,I like it when you tell us stories,tuck me in at bedtime,hug and kiss me,spend time playing with me and so much more, but i do not like it when you yell at me, spank me or punish me, it makes me sad and at such times when you call me I am scared to come to you because I think you will beat me”
For lack of what to say , I heard myself slowly say, “So is it that I just spank you or yell at you for nothing, you always do something wrong before I do that right?” And she nodded affirmatively, So I continued, if you do not like that I yell or spank you, try to keep from doing the things that make me do so.
okay mum,she replied, but you will agree that you too made similar mistakes when you were my age,I want you to forgive when I say Sorry, and when you forgive you do not have to yell or spank anymore.
It was one of those moments in motherhood that one does not forget in a hurry, our conversation continued and gladly it ended well, we hugged said the I love you’s And “Settled our Differences”!!
The fear factor is the focus here, The lesson for me is when she said she gets scared when I yell. parents we must discipline our children but we must keep it friendly ,we want them to respect and obey us not fear us so we can keep communication between us and them active or else ,we loose them to the wrong hands..(God Forbid) and lets face it,we all made mistakes when we were children, but somehow we forget, remember how every parent always came first in class, story,story (laughing in turanchi)!
It is my prayer that every parent reading this will go home and settle their differences with their kids before its too late oo hmmmn I no fit shout, Laugh oo, e reach to laugh, but when we are done laughing let us do what we have to do,
Always yours in motherhood sharing my thoughts