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25 September 2017 Blog Mum's Diary News


                                CAN YOU SAY THAT YOU GIVE YOUR KIDS QUALITY TIME?

  There is great wisdom in Patricia’s story as it relates with the subject mater, I hope you find it as educative as I did,read and learn.Here goes….

At 70 something years of age, I think and I am sure and you will agree with me and I can say “I’ve been there and done that”.I have all the good things of life for which I am truly grateful to God. Cars, Houses, jewelries and the likes. I became a “Professor” twelve years ago having bagged my PhD from the “Great Ife” so yes life has been good to me and one could easily envy me seeing that seemingly I have “everything”.

 

However, as I grew older, I tried to look back and reflect on my life. I realize that all these things are good and like I said, I am grateful but what I treasure the most are my kids, my daughter, now a wife and mother in her own home and my son who became a man before I could say the words “Jack Robinson”!

My one and only regret is that I never spent enough time with my Kids in those tender years of life when it really mattered. In fact, they practically grew up with my mum and their nanny after my husband passed on.

I guess my grief saw me throwing myself more into my career and academics, my hard work paid off and earned me good money, but I lost something that all the money in the world cannot buy! I missed out on the most important stage of my children’s life; I will forever be indebted and grateful to my mother. Thanks to God and her, they turned out great.

When she passed on at a ripe old age of 97yrs, it was obvious from the way they mourned her that they felt they had lost a mother and not a grandmother hmmmm …., I ‘m retired now and with all the time in the world for them, but they too have moved on with their own lives. I live alone in a big house with 3 domestic Staff who call me “mummy” but it’s not the same! Maybe I could have had more kids if I wasn’t so busy.

Yes the kids visit and bring me gifts stuff I do not really need and even if I did, I could afford them myself!  Funny isn’t it? How life turns tables, I used to bring home lots of gifts for them whenever I was returning from a long trip when what they really needed then was my time. Now, they visit and bring me gifts and I have to stop myself from screaming “take the gifts away just spend time with me”,It really hurts.

I want to be part of their lives so badly, but there is only so much I can do now besides pray fervently for them. Do you know that one time; I left the house as early as 4 am so I could beat traffic and catch a 6:30 bus! the kids were sleeping and I kissed them goodbye leaving wrapped gifts by their bedside. I returned 8 days later to find in shock that my daughter who was about 11yrs then hadn’t opened hers! When I asked her why? She said she was upset that I left without saying goodbye. Now for a little girl to resist the temptation to open a nicely wrapped gift from her mother for 8days, she must have been hurt real bad, that was deep!I felt so guilty but did that stop me? No! Neither did it slow me down. That’s why, I feel guilty till date especially for her because at least, my son had his dad for a bit but for her it was mostly grandma.

So you ask me, is it wrong to work hard or to go to school? Again my answer is “No” but here’s what I know for sure, you must be able to strike a balance, trust me, I know that all the money, fame and success in the world is not worth sacrificing your role in the vital years of your children’s lives for besides when you invest your time in your children hopefully, they will grow up to do for you those things you didn’t have time to pursue because of them!Your kids need your time more than they need your gifts or money!

If this has blessed you,by all means like and share to bless someone else,and watch out for next weeks article, thanks to “Patricia” for sharing her story, you too  can share yours and inspire others . you can send me an email to mimi.dogo@kapital929fm. Be assured of our highest regards and utmost confidentiality please.

Always yours in motherhood

Mimi Dogo

 

 

 

 


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