So the children are going back to school for most schools and for my kids I observed a couple of new faces and learnt they are transfer students .I also noticed that my daughters excitement about returning to school after the break seemed to diminish, so I had to find out why
“Mum I am the best student in my class and the teachers favorite, he calls me his Personal Assistant and it makes me feel important, What if one of the new students take my place” she said , Hmmmn I sighed, you will be just fine, but when you get home, we are going to have a talk you and I .
…Some time ago I saw a post on social media on making children feel loved and important even when they do not come tops in class or when they make mistakes… flashing back now at the conversation I just Had with my daughter, i got the feeling she felt important only because she is the teachers favorite and personal “assistant” if I am right and I hope I am not, Then I need to set the record straight , she must become aware of the fact that she is special and important regardless of titles or performance.
Now here is the deal, I am not saying its ok for a child to be made to be comfortable with just being average,or feel comfortable making mistakes, No! but i do believe (and not just for children )that a person is not their, grades,or mistakes or their job, titles, bank account, car, clothes,you name it…Its much much deeper than that!
It is no coincidence that just as i was typing this post, i got a forwarded post that i feel strongly to share because i think it is connected to the message of this text ,I do not know the origin but i hope you make something usefull of it,Here goes
*If your child has poor self esteem,it means you need to encourage them more than you advice them
*If your child is cowardly(for lack of a better word)it means you must learn not to help them too quickly with something, let them try at first, you can help later
*If your child is excessively jealous .it is because you only congratulate them when they successfully complete a task, you must begin to appreciate them when they improve at something even if they do not successfully complete it
*If you child intentionally disturbs you ,it may just be that you are not physically affectionate enough
*If your child is secretive,it is because they do not trust your ability to deal with a matter and not blow it out of proportion!
*If your child rebels ,it is because ,it is because they know you care more about what others think than what is right
*If your child listens to others more than you,it may just be that you are usually to quick to jump to conclusions
If your child is too quick to anger ,it is because you give too much attention to misbehavior than you do good behavior
Generally speaking, these rules may not always apply, but i do belive Its worth giving a serious thought,and having done all,pray for your kids.
from one mum to another (sharing my thoughts)
Heres wishing us all a great school year and grace to nuture well rounded ,wholesome, confident children